The Videos

For those of us who got the original CD version of FFE there was a special treat instore for us, full motion videos! Hurrah! However, they were a bit, um, well, I dont think they were supposed to be quite so funny...

For those of you that got the disk version or have downloaded the shareware/jjffe/other version, you wont have the videos, sorry. You can view the videos by visiting and looking in the downloads section!

So here is 'the list' I posted to the newsgroup several years ago, prompted by a severe fit of boredom, rediscovered in the Google archives only recently. Its something of a sarcastic review of the worst videos (production, acting etc) and helps keep you entertained for at least 3 mins... They can be found in the 'data' section of the cd.

fsh6.avi - "Action!!"
st27.avi - <MUMBLE, bad editing>
fr6.avi - fustrated Shakespeare act-o-r (see c10.avi too)
fr1.avi - the worst wig in the world? (same actor as st7.avi)
f41.avi - some kind of gaffaw at the beginning
f30.avi - "...there was a full stop there you fool..."
(p9, p10, p11 for more bad acting from this bloke)
f29.avi - see above
f17.avi - "..I said _feeeeeeling_ man <I cannot work with these amateurs>..."
(look, he may be good at assembler programming, but that doesn't mean he'll be a good actor ...)
f15.avi - getting personal...
c7.avi - The mystery sound at the start
bb2.avi - "I'm to stoned to be bothered..."
c40.avi - Hey, look, he's just been snorting something (see above)
c39.avi - You would of thought they'd choose some one who can speak - see c47.avi too.
c30.avi - I bet they all feel like fools now... (p16, p17, sh5 too)
c19.avi - What's that last word? ('invidia'? - probably 'in video')
c15.avi - The hideously fake accent begins to slip (in 'fight')
c14.avi - Mystery sound 2 at the end (a voice)
c13.avi - Her 2 front teeth drop out at the end, right on the smile too, shame :).
bb9.avi - Just plain gay.
bb7.avi - "Now I'm all butch, grrrr" (see above)
bb43.avi - Even after 1300 years, he's still sporting *that* haircut
bb42.avi - "He he, its mad," qoutes the video, "I'm well 'ard too, me"
bb33.avi - This guy is missing half his head (at the start)
bb22.avi - "Well done, you spotted today's deliberate mistake" he said through gritted teeth...
bb17.avi - Oh, ha ha bloody ha, my sides are splitting.
You hear the beginning of a 'D' word at the end with this one, probably something along the lines of 'dick head'.
p31.avi - A good 'shrimp' ?? Doesn't he mean 'shrink' ??
p32.avi - Mystery Sound 3 at the end (laughter?, is there a Baboon there too?)
p6.avi - Mystery Sound 4 at the end (something being dropped?)
r3.avi - You can see his red shirt in the bottom left where the costume, er I mean bit of carpet, they've used isn't big enough. (r4 too)
sh1.avi - You can hear a dog barking throughout this one. Maybe this is a nod to all those Sci-fi B movies...Dogs in Space!

f46.avi - Listen up Braben!
f43.avi - Listen up Gametek!

I just can't believe that this was a proffesional production. All of the actors (apart from about 2) are pathetic, and others just over act it completely. This is probably why Braben didn't integrate the videos more into the game - they are complete shite. Also, you would of thought they could use a few more actors. One moment thay are camp BBS staff, the next the same bloke is an Imperial Storm Trooper (grrrr)!

f50.avi - neither am I ...